You Have To Burn The Rope

all i get is a black box and some swinging tunes.
posted by empath at 4:46 PM on April 4



I was playing without my headphones on and almost flagged this post. My apologies. It is great.
posted by Gary at 4:47 PM on April 4



The rope is a lie.
posted by maudlin at 4:52 PM on April 4 [1 favorite]

BY DAVE D'ALESSANDRO
Star-Ledger Staff
HOUSTON -- Once again, the sage words of their former captain are an evocative presence, notably his famous observation that the Nets' most persistent talent is mentally letting go of the rope.

There was no truth to the rumor, however, that Jason Kidd lent his old mates a rope Saturday night just so that they could let go of it -- physically, mentally, or any which way they choose -- or hang themselves with it, which is actually its most common usage.

Advertisement

More than likely, the Nets played the last important game of their season that night in Dallas, a night that actually could have meant something. In the process, they officially fell out of the top eight in the East, and there are no signs that they're ready to use the metaphorical rope to climb back into the playoff picture.

But if they had any ambition to make the games matter again, they'll have to overcome this hideous habit of giving up, giving in, and running away the moment other teams bare their teeth.

"As soon as they delivered a punch, we were done," said forward Boki Nachbar, whose team will try to somehow get its act together tonight against the white-hot Rockets, who have won 18 straight.

"It's something that's been addressed. It's our biggest problem now. We have a four- or five-minute stretch, the other team goes up 15, and that's it. We're done."

To wit:


The Nets outplayed the Spurs for 18 solid minutes, but after the champs hit them with a counterpunch in the last six minutes of the second period, the Nets were never heard from again.


They had two strong quarters at New Orleans, which didn't show much interest in the game until halftime, and when the Hornets started swarming in the third quarter, the Nets turned tail and fled.


And they showed some defensive grit in the first quarter at Dallas, but the moment Brandon Bass and Malik Allen showed they were going to take the aggressiveness to another level, the blue team folded its tent.


I managed to beat the whole damn game.
posted by ColdChef at 4:53 PM on April 4



Apparently this needs the latest Flash client or something. There's also a download for Windows here

Trailer here
Walkthrough parts 1, 2
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 4:54 PM on April 4 [1 favorite]



That was great.
posted by gwint at 4:55 PM on April 4



If you look real close you'll see a heart in the chandelier.

I didn't know how to use the weapons. I guess I shoulda read the manual first. Not that it mattered.

Now I'm a hero. Yay. What's next? Ooh. They got videos of this game at YouTube, I'll bet.
posted by ZachsMind at 4:55 PM on April 4



I'm in love...
posted by pupdog at 4:55 PM on April 4



4. Also, you can't really die
posted by infinitewindow at 5:00 PM on April 4



I am stuck on level 6. any tips?
posted by aubilenon at 5:00 PM on April 4



Have you tried burning the rope?
posted by mrnutty at 5:01 PM on April 4 [4 favorites]



ProTip: Read the manual before you attempt to fight Grinning Colossus. I didn't even know I had the axe attack the first time I played.
posted by Gary at 5:02 PM on April 4



Crashes my firefox
posted by T.D. Strange at 5:04 PM on April 4



in opera you can add fire to the context menu, makes the game really easy
posted by yath at 5:08 PM on April 4



Riddle me this, Batman! How come if an infinite number of axes can't take out the big bad, that one measley little chandelier does the trick? Huh? HUH!? I know you are, but what am I!? Of course, the truth is the game leaves you trapped inside the building with a broken chandelier and a rank grinning colossus carcass. Forever. Insert maniacal laughter here.

Game over, man! Game over!
posted by ZachsMind at 5:09 PM on April 4



Weirdly, I managed to kill it with the axes. No lie.
posted by boo_radley at 5:09 PM on April 4



It's great how context can turn a mediocre song into something wunderbar. Fuck being that guy, I want to be this guy. He has all the cheat codes and knows how to work a bowler!
posted by bunnytricks at 5:11 PM on April 4



So, its like portal, but with a shorter game, and a funny song at the end.

Its like the reader's digest version of portal really.
posted by mrzarquon at 5:14 PM on April 4



If you leave it open in a tab for a couple hours, Jesus sings to you.
posted by waraw at 5:21 PM on April 4



The MeFi guild Progress Quest raid is at 6:00. I don't want everyone getting distracted by this game and showing up late. Again.
posted by Gary at 5:22 PM on April 4



Don't worry if you can't figure it out. I saved you all...
posted by Naberius at 5:25 PM on April 4



WTB [DWARVEN CHANDELIER OF THE MONKEY] PST
posted by cortex at 5:29 PM on April 4



You have to burn my bacon to get my goat.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 5:38 PM on April 4



The song at the end is awesome!
posted by betterton at 6:01 PM on April 4



Ouch. Rope burn.
posted by The Bellman at 6:03 PM on April 4



Was slightly better than Quest for the Crown though.
posted by sandking at 6:14 PM on April 4



Here's the walkthrough for people who are stuck.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 6:46 PM on April 4 [1 favorite]



THAT WAS GHEY I BEET THE GAME
posted by yhbc at 7:11 PM on April 4



does anyone have a torrent for the ROM of this game?... sorry probably shouldn't ask here but I am DESPERATE.
posted by Frasermoo at 7:45 PM on April 4



Now I'm a hero!!!!
posted by everichon at 9:21 PM on April 4



AERIS DIES!!!11
posted by GoingToShopping at 2:56 AM on April 5 [1 favorite]



Here's my walkthrough, which is a little shorter than that other guy's: Burn The Rope.
posted by taz at 4:04 AM on April 5



That was lovely.
posted by The Monkey at 5:01 AM on April 5



I like how the boss shoots eyeballs from his eyeballs.
posted by Nelson at 9:32 AM on April 5



If anyone's interested, I wrote some rope burning scripts. Might help out a little bit...
posted by betaray at 10:00 AM on April 5



What a great game.
posted by ikkyu2 at 12:23 AM on April 7



« Older The Every Child Matters Education Fund, a non-prof... | Snoop Dogg performs "Sensual S... Newer »